Thursday, July 28, 2005
Its really a mentally draining task to work with uncle lester. Oh gosh ! All the time im listening to his philosophy of life. Im not saying its good, Its fulfilling but its kinda brain juice drying you know. All the time im thinking how to counter his words and taking in the important information that i should know. And there's so many homework i need to do ! Argh ! Spare me !
Let me ask everybody who come across this blog entry a question. Give me a realistic and truthful answer.
"What if you are only left with the last 30 mins of your life ? What will you be doing ?"
Leave answers in my tagboard and i'll tell you what you will be doing.
Help ! I cant keep up with the world !
Monday, July 25, 2005
Seriously... i hate being so pathetic when i see others so happily.. Evil side of me starts to come up.. *Evil grin*
Some rich kids are just farking lucky to be born with a silver spoon. Listen ! They are just FORTUNATE. But they will never grow up ! Being protected by their parents. Maybe im just biased against 1 person. who's mouth must be rotting cause he has a poisonous mouth who just cant stop irritating people. Right my banana ? So wad if he's getting a car ? Its not HIM who earn it himself. Its HIS DAD who bought it for him. He's always saying he's very matured and have thinking of his own. Oh gosh ! Spare me ! You are just a spoilt brat who just have everything your way. Prove to people that you can earn everything by YOURSELF. By then, im sure people will respect you ! If there is this day. But well.. In my point of view, that day might never come. I cant believe that im beginning to hate you and just plain you. Its just SO irritating ! Grrr~
Im not going to look back into the past and realise what an idiot i have been. I thought "brothers" were meant to stick together like sisters ? But from what i heard, the once-strong brotherhood i thought was un-breakable is definitely having cracks. And i mean BIG CRACKS~
Sunday, July 24, 2005
Skipped another day of work AGAIN~ im going to have a bad record man ! But im leaving soon anyway.. Went to watch Fantastic Four yesterday with the usual Clique. Nice ! But the waiting time from 11 plus to 1.55 is definitely NOT nice or fun ! Kinda fell asleep in the preview lounge. And the unlucky LK have to disturb me when im sleeping, so he got scolded by me. I hate it when people disturb my precious sleep.
Anyway. Its SUNDAY today ! But its a different day.. Because.....
Im never one who will show my affection for my family. I never know how to express myself. One day i will regret it definitely. My uncle pointed it out that i got to change in order to solve the problems between me and my dad. He ask me why i will want to go over his house and stay ? The answer was hidden SO deeply in my heart that i didnt even realise it. The house was never like a home full of warmth that i will anticipate happily at the thought of going home straight after work. I just didnt want to admit it. I haven been talking to my dad for very long. Cause i cant get myself to get over it and not to have any conflict with him. Its just so hard. But i know i got to change. I never stood in their shoes.. Never thought whether my parents will be happy to come home and face 3 kids who may not appreciate them or may not even be at home. The same old untidy house because nobody bothers to clean up. Never thought how tired my mum will be after working and still have to come home and cook for us. And also how my dad drives taxi from morning to night to keep the family going.. *Tears welled up when i thought of all this that i never once think in the past* Simple family problems that most people cant solve as well.. So i got to give them more attention.
My parents, sister and me went outside for dinner to celebrate my mum's birthday. I talked nicely whenever they ask me something. tried to joke a lil. Im trying my best. At least its the 1st step. Better than not trying..
Alright.. Enough of emotional issues~
A guy msged me in friendster with a POEM`
i was thinking. Wah~ still got poem some more ah ! So artistic ah ! BUT not interested. Cant be bothered to reply this kind of msges. Bo liao~ I know im a lil bad posting the poem here BUT at least i didnt post the WHOLE msg plus his PROFILE and embarrass him in front of all who reads my blog. Ha !
So the poem goes like this~
Tire & empty creep in the heart.
Yet beauty of thou shining tru.
Sadness of past lay in the dust.
With hope I have that snow fall.
Snow seem cold but warm in heart.
Future is blind but I prayed.
Seriously. I dont understand this poem lor. Blame it on me having no artistic brains or wadever. Pls lor. I dont believe in this kind of online meeting friends lor. Its stupid lor. Who knows how many girls you send that poem to.
I dont trust people easily. Much less strangers i dont even know. Maybe i dont even should trust people i call frens ?
Friday, July 22, 2005
Ever wonder what it will be like NOT to be YOU ? The special and unique YOU ?
Ever wonder what it will be like if you are born in another part of the world ?
Ever wonder what it will be like if you are not who you are called ?
Ever wonder what it will be like if YOU were never born ?
Thought about this questions before ? If you had, did you get any answers satisfactory ?
I bet not ! There will never be a satisfactory answer OR a perfect answer.. Humans are never satisified.
Why is it always so easy to say things YET so hard to do it ? Its easy to ask someone to step into people's shoes and think in his/her place YET can you do it ? Its easy to ask someone to break up with his bf/gf if they aint treating you well enough or there's no longer any feelings there YET can you do it ? Its easy to get words out of your golden mouth but have you ever thought of what you will do when it happens to you ? I bet you dont.. But no worries.. Most humans dont anyway.
I have got to change. Change into a better person. I wont let surroundings change me. i'll rather change the surroundings. Its not a matter of choice.. Its a MUST ! I'll thrive in my career hopefully. I wont let myself down either.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
someone's msn nick spurred me to blog this post.
"not all filipinos are maids.. not all china girls are prostitutes.. not all blacks are roadsweepers.. not all guys are bad.. give chances"
well i sort of agree with the 1st 3 parts. and maybe a lil of the 4th part. BUT tt part definitely DONT refer to him.. Cause its totally wrong. He doesnt deserve a chance at all. Not from anyone at all.. Why should anyone give a chance to people who dont even appreciate it ? I dont know why but seeing him put this nick just ignite the anger flame in my body..
Maybe im wrong. Maybe im prejudiced against him. I dont know. Neither do i want to know.
Basically. For me, Chances are just like Trust. It doesnt come easily. Earn for it. Not ask for it. Will you get a job just by asking ? Will you get a meal just by asking ? Will you get money just by asking ? Chances are low~ So earn for it !
Messed up life~ Gone case ! Im missing out something in my life.. Yet i cant figure out whats missing... Perhaps i need a You ? Just perhaps... just maybe.....
Monday, July 18, 2005
its monday again~ monday blues... Haven been feeling good for the past few days. emotionally down. No idea why. No intention to try to know why.
Last friday was my granny birthday.. as well as my cuzzie's birthday..The whole family gathered as usual @ a restaurant and eat just like every year.. Oh man! My oldest cuzzie got himself a gf. And she's pretty for a start.. and she's the gentle type. Im totally surprised. But good for him ! Anyway, went to Farmart to lim kopi with my youngest uncle and my cuzzies.. He managed to convince me that working @ Starhub wont have a future.. I cant go that far.. so im quitting my job most probably in the middle of Aug.. and pop over to my uncle's there and work.. Start as a Telemarketeer and progress to be a sales agent..
Went to work as usual on Sat... nothin special happened... After work, went to Shang.. Not to work but to find HY. His cousin having her wedding over there.. Rich ! After that ,went to Indochine "Forbidden City" at Clarke Quay to chill.. Nice place to chill~ But drinks pretty ex..
I have MIA for the past few days. My hp bill should be getting cheaper~
Im blogging at work~ HAHA! Going home now~
Friday, July 15, 2005
My world's closing down on me... leaving me breathless.. im staring into the space once again.
Tell me what to do.. to get over this and that...
At this point of time, my life seems to be pulled away from me.. Everything doesnt seems to be mine anymore.
Monday, July 11, 2005
YEAH !!!! I had such a wonderful day today !!
No 1 : I finally get to see Intial D ! Which is so freaking nice in MY point of view. The moment i see Edison Chen, i just feel like screaming !! But i abstain myself from doing so to prevent making a fool out of myself. He's SO COOL and handsome ! Awww~ Speaking of Edison, his car in the movie looks FABULOUS ! How nice if i have the car ! Ha ! Jay Chou's not bad also ! I like the way he is ! He's cool and quiet~ BUT i couldnt help but laugh when he cried at the end, i know im bad but i think he's not cut out for crying scenes.. At the last part when i hear Yi Lu Xiang Bei, i was moved~ Not by Jay's crying scene but by his song. This shows how talented he is as a Singer. Overall, i LOVE the movie ! Anyway, after the movie, IF im not mistaken.. I think i saw Stella Huang @ the toilet with red hair~ Duhz ! How nice if i saw Edison instead~ Jay Chou's ok too but i prefer Edison... =)
Pictures !!!
Last of all.. TATA ~ EDISON CHEN !
No 2 : Had dinner @ Phin Steakhouse ! YUMMY YUMMY~!!! well.. There's actually nothing much to elaborate about food so... lets start with the photos !
Before the food came Part 1
Part 2
Xinyi & Alvin~ Gonna get married on 19th Nov~ Congrats !
Coke Float~
See my Wild Mushroom Soup so small bowl~
XY's Clam Chowder Mushroom Soup bigger than mine !
Garlic Bread !!
HA ! Seems like XY's enjoying her soup ah !
Alvin's Fish & Chips
XY's Ladies Cut Sirloin Steak
My so-called Humongous Sirloin Steak (Which i dont see much different frm ladies cut.. Maybe except the price)
Alvin's enjoying his Fish & Chips hur~
After dinner, we are damn FULL~ Relax photo-ing~
Heh heh.. You people must be thinking i have nothing to do right ! Ha ! Its fun k ! Notice i dont have any photo eating ? Haha ! They are too busy eating !
I've been in a daze. I wonder why. what happened ? I ask myself why.. No answer to the question i ask. Nobody can give me the answer i want. What am i thinking of... Why do i seem so Lost once again.. im getting emotional once again... im just feeling so lost... So lost from the world. Why is it so hard to understand myself. I have the urge to cry yet no tears will drop.. Cause i wont let them fall.. It just shows that im weak.. Maybe what i really need is to live alone... Just alone~
im on vcd marathon yesterday. Guess wad ! i chiong vcd from sun 1 plus in the afternoon till mon 5 plus in the early wee hours ! more than 24 hours k ! i think im mad but i dont think i have much time to watch so why not watch it in one go ?
"Tan Pan Zhuan Jia" aka Take My Word For it ! 5 stars show k ! Its showing every weekday @ 10pm. But i dont think i have much time so i sort of rented it and watched it all in one go. I dont like to be in suspense so i rather get things over and done with.
How cool is it to be a PNC (Police Negotiator Cadre) ?? Freaking cool man ! But the kind of mental pressure is kinda VERY traumatic esp when you see someone just die in front of you yet you couldnt even save him/her. Worst of all, what IF tt someone is your friend ? What will you do ? i think i will just break down man. Anw, the kind of satisfaction everytime you manage to save a live with your mouth is so indescribeable..
Hmmmm... After watching the show, i have lots of different kind of feeling. sort of like the one i mentioned above. Alright. How will you feel when you find out someone whom you thought was your best friend YET is having an affair with your bf/gf or even husband/wife ? I totally cant imagine this happening BUT im sure somewhere out there, it really happened.
Enough of the sypnosis, catch the show man ! Its REALLY VERY nice !
Im going to bath soon and leave the house to meet XY and Alvin. For Intial D. Im bringing along camera to take photo ! Haha !
Recently, i really feel like going overseas. I may not be very patriotic or wadever. But i do like Singapore. Yet, i keep thinking how would it be like to emigrate to other countries ? Sort of to start a whole new life ? My dream place - SYDNEY ! Since young, i sort of have a dream.. Thats to travel all over the world. To take pictures of the scenery of each country i visit for memorial. Esp the night scenery ! How nice ?
Haii.. i wanted to post some photos of Sydney and Hong Kong.. BUT i dont know why but i couldnt edit Sydney's photos so im left with Hong Kong's Night Scenery. Nice !
Anyway, here goes..
Hong Kong !!!
HongKong's Jumbo restaurant
Got to go ! Byed !
Friday, July 08, 2005
Been DAMN freaking long since i last went to kbox man !
met up with KL and Kev for sushi yesterday ! *Yummy* Then, went for kbox session after that !
And as usual, im working today. Everyday's the same thing so nothing much to talk about.
heh heh ! im meeting XY next mon. to watch Intial D ! YESH ! Finally ! I know im an idiot talking abt Intial D at this point of time when everybody else already watched it. Fark it ! i haven watch YET k !
Maybe if im free, i'll meet my darling Jojo next friday ! Perhaps with SOME other people. hmmm.. i thought it will feel weird. But hey, it feels kinda alright to refer them as SOME other people.
SO Sorry my banana, for neglecting You for so long. im sure you will get the job ! i miss You so much !! heh heh . WO ZHEN DE HEN GAO XING REN SHI NI ! *Our secret language* haha !
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
Actually, chinese birthday. though now me and my sis is kinda pissed with her for not ordering pizza today ! Its a SPECIAL occasion. and its not that we dont want to treat her but im BROKE k ! and i farking got LOTS of debts to clear. She just wont understand. Pointless ! yah yah ! i know you people will be nagging at me for being such a unfilial daughter. aww ~ wadever. when im pissed, i feel like the-whole-world-offended-me ! so Worst time to talk to me. my brother just got the taste of my Unhappiness !
Still, You're my mummy ! I still love you though im a rude brat as you always said
im so impressed with myself !! HAHA ! i managed to make him jealous just over a msn nick. haha. SEE ? Msn nicks can be so powerful k. Now's payback time. Now im like him in the past and vice versa ! im returning him with his USED-to-be cold and cant-be-bothered attitude. i should ask him how he feels man. How does it feels when someone who used to love you so much suddenly talks so cold to you, cant be bothered to flirt with you AND dont even feel any difference when she sees your gd nite msg and dont even wan to reply you ?
Indeed all this makes me feel so high ! ! im Lovin' it !
anyway, was on afternoon shift today. started @ 1230pm and ended @ 10pm. a lil more interesting days. guys are always much easier to talk to. no idea why i always click better with guys than girls. duhz. i din have a choice as to who i go dinner break today. so out of no choice, went PS Mac with Desmond(Ice mountain ! i'll explain why later) and Ben( Typical Ah Beng ) . The 2 of them cant stop shooting me one lor. from the start till the end.. -.-" well. why i call Desmond "Ice Mountain", is not becus he's pure like the Water brand. Its because he's farking DAO when i 1st saw him and be4 dinner break just now, i think he's a freaking DAO guy. after dinner break, got to noe him n ben better a LIL. they are pretty nice people actually. im quite good with Jia Lin (came in @ the same time as me ) too ! maybe becus we got no other friends there ? we got only each other . haha. The rest of the people there is pretty nice too !!!
i just realised this is the 1st time im introducing my workplace people. haha. actually makes not much difference, cus they wun be reading this either.
oh ya. lemme think if there is anythin interesting today tt happened ! YES ! there is ! while i was going up bus 300 (Feeder Bus), a chinese woman in her 30s cut a malay woman in her 30s or 40s que, den the malay woman cant stop scolding lor. i think i heard the chinese woman say sorry she din see her. and know what the malay woman said ? she said : got eyes oso no use. say cant see ! i was right behind them and i was like -.-". cut que nia ! need to keep scolding meh. when i walked past the malay char bo, she was still nagging non-stop ! Everyone should learn a lesson !
NEVER CUT a AUNTIE QUEUE ok !!!
Monday, July 04, 2005
started work @ 10am today. ended @ 730pm. im feeling so what-the-fuck ! my colleague(A LAMER) told me tt 1 of the dealer say my voice is so "MAN". WTH ! when u are losing your voice, any girl/woman WONT sound like a girl/woman ! Idiot !
went ta Shang and cash out. met up with iz for a while. talk and puffed ! lol. i kinda feel bad for neglecting all my friends for so long.
i promise to make up to you all when i got the time. i dont wanna lose any of my friends. =)
anyway, met up with kailee and kang ni @ 302. they had their dinner while we talk until 10 plus be4 heading home. been long since i last saw them. KL's still the same. KN's becoming darker and she's going Bangkok. oh man ! so xin fu. Oh ya ! i was telling KL just now abt tt Someone called me last fri asking how i am i blah blah blah. i think i was pretty cold . which is good. couldnt even remember abt this until i suddenly tot of it. so i gotta blog down. a sense of satisfaction im handling this so well. so different from last time. i WIN ! Ha !
NP's study week and exams coming ! i certainly hope my friends in NP score well. even if they never go sch and study just like Ms Chong Kai Lee. HAHA !
its pretty amazing when you see people you never seen in a long time change so much. saw a guy from sec sch (1 yr my junior) turning out to be a handsome fine young man. Nice change~ Time really changes people.
tomorrow's another day of work . another same old routine. aint you people bored after hearing me say im bored, tired blah blah blah everyday ? i am actually quite sick of it. But no choice. its my life. haii~ Everday after work, i just feel like hitting my bed the moment i step home. But i feel obliged to blog about my everyday life. so at least my friends know what's going on everyday in my life. Ha ! oh man. im so thick-skinned aint i ? LOL
Just finished my dinner. Going to have some durians be4 i slp ! *yummy*
im falling sick ! Save Me !
Sunday, July 03, 2005
Life sux.
Esp when you got no life at all.
Doing the same old routine everyday makes me sick.
im falling sick. after answering calls everyday.
im getting fatter. after eating so much while working to kill time.
im tired. after working everyday.
im feeling bored. after i cant go out cus i got $$ and no time to spare.
In all, my life just sucks.
There's 2 new guys coming in tomorrow. Ha ! They better be interesting enough.
Gonna hit my bed now ! Because as usual, IM TIRED !
Mich's Lost once again~
Saturday, July 02, 2005
kinda lazy to blog yesterday after finishing work @ Shang. so here i am now.
flipped the Straits Times be4 heading for work @ Shang yesterday. and when i reach the ballroom.. TATA~! Such a coincidence its NUS dinner. not DnD or wadever. IMPORTANT dinner with PM Lee Hsien Loong giving speech k ! Read today's Straits Times and you will see him on the papers too ! HA ! He's one of those i served yesterday. *Proud* actually not proud, kinda see these Important people for lots of times already. AND, my whole body's aching all over becus i carried chairs. duhz.
anyway, head to RY hse yesterday after work. MY they all playing mahjong. while me and joanna entertaining ourselves with hilman's friendster. pretty lame actually. slept for a while and i gotta rush home to bath be4 heading to work again.
*tired*
as for today, nothing happened. just reached home not long. heard that there's 2 new guys coming to our department on mon. haha. im looking forward to not being the newest ! Met up with lala for a while just now be4 she heads back to work and i go home with a i-feel-like-dying feeling.
finished blogging and im going to have my LATE dinner and slp.
